Life among people

Living among these people, I learned that I am running after Money
But, that is not what i wanted to run after.

Living among these people, I started to loose pride and respect
But, that is not what i wanted to loose.

Living among these people, I have been lying all my life
But, I wanted to be truthful throughout my life

Living among these people, I started to do anything for living
But, I do not want to do anything just for living

Living among these people, I learned lot of things
But, Most of them were unwanted things

Living among these people, I learned what life is
But, It turned out lot more than what I expected

Living among these people, I learned difference between good and bad
But, what i believed as good turned out to be bad

Living among these people, I learned laughter
But, It was more prettier when it came out of someone you care

Living among these people, I learned what death is
But, it appears more than physical disappearance

Living among these people, I learned speech and words
But, It turned out that its used mostly for what it not meant to be

Living among these people, I learned writing
But, It turned out that its purpose has not served

Living among these people, I realized many things
But, It would be wasted, if I haven't passed it on

Axioms

It has been long time, since i have visited my blogging site. There were many times i felt that i should write a blog now but, all the times i would just have only the concept and not the whole summary and many times, i felt very lazy to build the blog on top of the concept. Even now I am just starting with the core, will try to give my best to convert it to blog.

I have been reading less recently due to my work commitments and other personal commitments, but whenever i read something there were millions of questions popping in my mind. Some of them I get answers and some of them i will forget sooner and only few out of those will stay in my mind and keep haunting me forever. One such questions to me is the question about Trust/Belief.

All things around us are based on Axioms which can neither proved nor disproved. say for eg. In mathematics 1+1 = 2 this is an axiom. you can never prove it and you cannot disprove it either because all your complex mathematics are based on these fundamentals. so what will happen if you started to think that 1+1 is not equal to 2. Just give it a thought. The same thing happened to me while reading a book.

It basically demolished all the morals and beliefs based on which our day to day life runs. The more sad part of this is that the book is considered as one of the epics in our culture. This again raised few other questions like could it be possible the author who translated the epic be wrong or the people who say that as our epic and not following the practices preached in the epic is wrong. if we drag this thread the questions will go on and on and will eventually lead to one basic question "How do we believe someone / something ?"

There has been lot of things we came across and lot of things which we doesn't know and at each and every instant of our life time we have been dealing with different kinds of people. In all the times we handle the situation with blind assumption that whatever we believe is correct, everything else is wrong. I have been like that in the past now with all these questioning comes to mind, I stopped trusting everyone.

Say a father instructs his son to be honest and truthful without himself being honest and truthful. Do you think that the child will be truthful in his life ?? I doubt he would. I believe that child learns from your behavior and not through words. Even if we assume that he believes his father and what would happen when the child came to know the truth?? He would stop believing his father anymore. If that is what happens, what would happen to his belief?? Its an unanswerable question, we may never know where his beliefs turn towards.

In days of yore people say that one will get all these instructions from a preceptor and he will get all his doubts clarified. But how would one Identify his preceptor. Even if someone comes and says that I am your preceptor how can one believe that ??. Is it the responsibility of the pupil to believe his preceptor or is it preceptors responsibility to bring belief in him.

I have been searching for answers everywhere but all i have come across is that how one should behave towards his preceptor and not how one can believe that so and so is his preceptor. These all gets one confused and the scriptures and vedas say that one shouldn't question scriptures, veda's and its ways. but i am actually questioning them to get belief in them. Without questioning how can one go on and blindly believe in something ??? That's again another question.

Axioms are something which are unquestionable, we all run our lives based on these fundamentals and if something breaks our basement then our life cannot sustain. It will be miserable and even if you try searching answers in Veda's and scriptures, it would just provide you information about how to follow it and not how to believe it.

These questions come and go but will never get resolved unless and until you realize the answers yourself, till then one is considered as struck at the same point without proceeding further in his path of morality.

Deceit

Recently, I have been thinking about upgrading my mobile phone. There is this one mobile phone (s2) which attracted me a lot. The only thing i hated about is its cost. Its way too expensive and i was a bit hesitant to buy it. Its nothing like I am not capable of getting one but, It actually triggered this question in my mind. Is it OK to spend so much money on this mobile ?? Will i be using the mobile worth fully for the amount I spent on it ??

There is no doubt that the phone provides all the feature it has promised and most of them are latest in technology but what is my stake in it? for example, it has WIFI which i can use only in home as the concept of hot-spot has not flourished in my country. But I already have a laptop and i am quite happy using it for surfing. It has DLNA functionality but again one needs to be connected to the same sub network to use the DLNA functionality in which case when i am sharing my media, I need to have my mobile within my home. i cannot go any where, any personal calls i will be missing. It has HD video recording and playing. if my usage is analyzed i will hardly use the camera in the mobile and i am pretty sure that feature is a liability to me.

I kept on analyzing all the feature that the mobile provides, finally I narrowed it to one feature apart from calling, PDF reader. I may use PDF reader to read some books. I am not that geeky to use all the features it provides but yet my desire to get one such mobile is high. I am not able to suppress it. Its like I need it badly and at the same time, I do not need a mobile with so many features which i barely use.

As always, I started to co-relate these things with life. That is when i realized the whole world is deceitful and in this world you will get what ever you want but you have to pay price for it. The price may be so high that making those decisions change the course of your life. Again it is what you decide defines you. I couldn't stop recalling an old saying here "Deep down your heart you may be an innocent child, but it is what you do decides who you are". So true !!!